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Networking

5 Things I Learned (the hard way) at Converge

November 4, 2025 by Mary Cravets

I just got back from the ICF Converge conference, and WOW! I had expected to pick up some new ideas, but what I didn’t expect was to come home with a list of lessons that were equal parts insightful and humbling.

Enjoy!

1. You can survive embarrassing yourself. I mean, really embarrassing yourself.

Not the “toilet paper on your shoe” kind – the cringey, make a bad impression in front of people you respect kind.

I went to a session on branding with Lisa Madaschi. Her neuroscience-based take on branding? Fascinating. We just happen to have different views on niche.

I got up to share mine… and then nerves took over. What I meant as a contribution came out sounding cringingly argumentative – maybe even self-promoting.

It was mortifying.

I did follow up with a message to her on LinkedIn, owned it completely, and apologized. She was so gracious about the whole thing. 

Here’s what I learned: I can survive embarrassing myself – even in front of people I deeply respect. Even when it feels like my reputation might’ve just taken a hit. 

And if making an impact is one of your core values too, you have to survive it. For me, that means forgiving myself quickly and getting back to the work that actually matters.

2. AI is fascinating – and completely distracting.

Let me be clear: I’m not anti-AI. It’s important to stay informed.

But at Converge, it seemed like every other session was about AI.

And while the tech is fascinating, the emphasis was felt way out of proportion to what coaches actually need to grow their businesses. Just like social media, it takes over the conversation – and pulls focus from what’s really important.

AI, like social media, is a tool. It should serve your strategy, not become your strategy. Otherwise, you end up chasing what’s new instead of focusing on what actually helps you reach your goals.

Sustainable growth still comes from strategic clarity, connection, and consistency.   

3. A renewed empathy for the awkwardness of networking.

It’s been a long time since I’ve been the “new kid in the cafeteria.” Usually, I walk into events knowing the culture, the players, and at least a dozen people I can wave at from across the room.

But Converge? It was different.

Global scale. Thousands of coaches. And the focus was squarely on the practice of coaching – not the business of it, which is where I tend to live.

For the first two days, I felt like a fish out of water. Then it hit me: this is what my clients feel when I encourage them to attend a networking event or start putting themselves out there.

That experience deepened my empathy. The risk they take isn’t theoretical – it’s real. And the courage it takes to show up in an unfamiliar space deserves to be celebrated every time.

4. When you sponsor an event, have a Plan A… and then about four backups.

I sponsored the coworking space at Converge – great concept, fun design, all the right intentions.

Except… there was no signage pointing people to it.

Combine that with me feeling a bit out of my depth and still cringing from my earlier “branding moment”? Plan A fizzled out fast.

So I created a Plan B (and C… and D). I jumped into morning learning circles, visited sponsor booths, introduced myself to coaching schools, and focused on one thing – connection.

Because of the pivot, I ended up having real conversations, making new contacts, and gaining valuable insights.

The lesson? Sponsorship is a tactic – connection is the strategy.

5. Rephrase instead of repeat.

During her opening keynote, Heather Hansen shared a simple communication tip that instantly stuck:

When you can’t understand someone – especially if they have an accent – instead of asking them to repeat what they said, ask them to rephrase it.

It seems like such a small thing, but it completely changes the energy of the conversation. It removes the awkwardness, helps both people feel understood, and opens the door for genuine connection.

Any tip that helps others feel more understood? It’s a keeper!

Converge, in a Nutshell

The most valuable lessons don’t come from the slides – they come from the awkward moments, the honest conversations, and the magic that happens when you have the courage to keep showing up.

Filed Under: Messaging, Mindset, Networking, Priorities, Speaking, Strategy

How to Ditch the Pressure of “Now or Never”

November 4, 2023 by Mary Cravets

At the end of the year, all I hear about is closing the year strong and creating a mind-blowing plan for 2024.

It is so much pressure, and I was starting to crack from the stress of it all. Here’s a 90 second tip where I share what I did to release the pressure fast!

Filed Under: Blog, Goal Setting, Income Generation, Messaging, Mindset, Networking, Priorities, Speaking, Strategy, Stress and Overwhelm, Time Management

Don’t Pick a Niche (what to do instead to get clients faster)

January 24, 2023 by Mary Cravets

Recently I shared that I am committing to the niche of Coaches, but for 12 years, I didn’t have a niche and brought my business to multiple 6-figures anyway!

So if you’re stressing out because marketing gurus are insisting you niche or perish, take a breath. Let me share when NOT to pick a niche, why this is so important to the growth of your business, and what to do instead in order to get clients faster.

Filed Under: Blog, Income Generation, Mindset, Networking, Priorities, Strategy

5 Speaker Prep Tips for In-Person Events

May 10, 2022 by Mary Cravets

After two years of virtual events, even very experienced speakers may have forgotten how to navigate speaking at a live event.

Including this girl.

Having knocked out my first 4 in-person gigs, here are my top 5 tips with details about how to get back in the saddle!

Tip #1: Micro-manage in-person events.

Tip #2: Deliver full presentation, no matter what.

Tip #3: Set your criteria for speaking for free (and stick to them!).

Tip #4: Practice, practice, practice your offer! 

Tip #5: Be mindful of your need for approval.

Filed Under: Blog, Entrepreneurship, Messaging, Mindset, Networking, Speaking, Strategy

#1 Way to Get Clients (HINT: it’s low-tech and cheap)

April 19, 2017 by Mary Cravets

The #1 way that coaches and most other service professionals get client is… drum roll please… referrals!!!

Admittedly, referrals have an image problem.

Referral generation sounds downright dull compared to “ultimate digital content planner” and “master Facebook ads in 5 days” or “the underground playbook for building your company online”.

It’s easy to get distracted by shiny new promises, but consider this: to generate referrals, there is almost no cost to you (awesome!), the technology is limited to email and phone so there’s no learning curve (yay!), referrals are warm prospects so the sales process is easier (yes!), and those referred prospects generally invest in higher level packages (cha-ching!).

Did referrals get just a tad more attractive?

Sweet!

But there’s another problem…

Most people don’t know how to generate referrals intentionally. It seems like it’s a random thing, with no stability or consistency. So even though you KNOW referrals are great, knowing isn’t enough.

Luckily, it’s easier than you think to get referrals rolling in. Let me show you what I mean:

  • In 2015, I took a few consistent steps each month and generated dozens of referrals equaling tens of thousands of dollars.
  • In 2016, I got so busy with clients and speaking that I stopped taking those steps and generated… one referral. Ugh.
  • In 2017, I (my team, actually) started taking these steps again and am back to receiving referrals every single month.

To generate referrals consistently, there are really only 3 steps:

  1. Identify everyone who is in a position to refer you. Remember that not everyone crosses paths with your ideal client, so even though your mom or neighbor might think you’re great, if they never encounter your ideal client, they can’t give you referrals.

The key to making this step work: Only invest time nurturing referral relationships with people who are in a position to, and are willing to, refer you

  1. Ask these people for a referral to your ideal client.

The keys to making this step work: First… before you say, “But I don’t want to be pushy,” let me assure you that people LOVE to help. They LOVE to contribute and be a part of your success. And second, make sure your “ask” is crystal clear: know who your ideal client is and describe them simply in your request for referrals.

  1. Repeat step #2 monthly to nurture your list. This is the step that makes all of the difference. Asking once doesn’t work. People are busy. They are interacting with dozens of people a day and your first ask gets lost in the shuffle in their minds.

The key to making this step work: Make this a priority every single month by scheduling an appointment in your calendar to connect with your list.

Now for confession time: as amazing as referrals are for a business, I still struggled to do the actions necessary to generate them. So if you find this challenging, please don’t beat yourself up.

Here are a few things that help to melt resistance and get results:

  • Script your referral asks to boost your confidence
  • Create simple contact lists to keep you organized
  • Schedule time in your calendar dedicated to referral generation
  • Customize your approach for your ideal client, industry and personal style
  • Get accountability

And remember to ask for help. Adam (the expert on my team who grew my referrals exponentially) has a variety of ways to help you succeed with referral generation. Contact Adam here to explore how he can help you build your business through referrals.

Filed Under: Blog, Marketing, Networking, Strategy Tagged With: Effective marketing, Get great clients, getting clients

A Simple Networking Courtesy

September 6, 2012 by Mary Cravets

It’s a simple thing, isn’t it? Asking for someone’s business card, that is. But it’s an action that implies a lot – “I’m interested,”  “I want to remember you,” “You’re important.”

Remember, when you’re networking, you’re making impressions on people left and right, and you don’t have a lot of time to do it. Take advantage of any action that will make a positive impact!

And absolutely everyone wants to experience the positive feelings that go along with being asked for their card – even event speakers and organizers. I’ve been speaking at and leading a lot of events lately and I have to tell you, 9 times out of 10 when I meet someone and ask for their card, they do not ask for mine.

Now I’m not here to criticize people who have neglected to ask for my card. I just want you to know that when I ask for their card, and the courtesy isn’t reciprocated, the exchange leaves me feeling flat. And who wants to make an impression like that? Especially when it can so easily be avoided!

The moral of the story is: ask for everyone’s cards. Yes, it is important so that you can follow up with people, of course. But just as important, although often overlooked, is the fact that through this simple action, you can help make someone else feel great!

Filed Under: Entrepreneurship, Networking

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