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Blog

Business Lesson from a Workout FAIL

July 20, 2020 by Mary Cravets 2 Comments

Several years ago I hired a personal trainer to help kickstart some New Year’s Resolutions. I showed up in the early morning hours hopeful and ready to kick some ass.

10 minutes later, I was ready to pass out and throw up.

I wasn’t that out of shape, and my trainer hadn’t pushed me that hard. What happened?

After a brief discussion, I learned that you shouldn’t drink a large protein smoothie 30 minutes before a workout.

I had assumed that because you need energy for a workout, the best solution would be to eat right before you go to the gym.

I thought back to other failed attempts at working out and realized that this laughably simple – but foundational – wrong assumption led to the majority of my failures.

Changing this ONE assumption led to years of success in fitness. And…

I see this stuff in business all the time.

The assumption that accepting money means you’re not fully in the spirit of service to others.

The assumption that marketing is all about saying “look at me, look at me, look at me!”

The assumption that sales is about convincing and pushing others to do something they don’t want to do.

(all wrong, BTW)

Unearth YOUR assumptions and question them. Hidden, they will keep you stuck. Revealed, they will shift your results forever.

Filed Under: Blog, Entrepreneurship, Mindset, Strategy

Gratitude and Half-Measures

November 26, 2019 by Mary Cravets 3 Comments

For me, simply feeling gratitude is a half-measure.

I feel grateful every day for my family, my health and my husband. But I find that my actions are not always in alignment with this gratitude.

This year, I have had no major health issues. But I slacked off exercising and eating healthy.

My family has been wonderful. And while I showed up for emergencies, I haven’t been attentive in small ways to show them how much I appreciate them.

My husband has been a rock. But I often (confession time) overwork, and he gets the short end of the stick with my attention and energy.

“Unexpressed gratitude communicates ingratitude.” – Andy Stanley

Simply feeling gratitude is not enough for me, so I’m focusing on expressing my gratitude through action. Are you with me?

Let’s not wait for an emergency to show our families how much we care. Call them, connect with them while they’re here and healthy.

Let’s not just write in a gratitude journal that we’re grateful for our health. Go exercise.

Let’s not settle for just feeling appreciation for our spouse. Knock off work early (or simply on time) while you still have energy to be present to focus on them.

Why don’t you post your gratitude in action commitment here? We’ll meet back here next year, and find out how it went!

Filed Under: Blog

Prague Blog, Part 2: The Big Aha

October 22, 2019 by Mary Cravets 1 Comment

Here’s the aha: I’ve been exhausting myself aiming for huge goals that I don’t care about.

During my month in Prague, I read the book The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fig* by Mark Manson. The timing of the book was excellent because I was pretty worn out by navigating in a foreign country and my defenses were down.

I got to the chapter of the book titled “You Are Not Special,” and read the following passage:

“The ticket to emotional health, like that to physical health, comes from eating your veggies – that is, accepting the bland and mundane truths of life: truths such as “Your actions actually don’t matter that much in the grand scheme  of things” and “The vast majority of your life will be boring and not noteworthy, and that’s ok.” This vegetable course will taste bad at first. Very bad. You will avoid accepting it.

But once ingested, your body will wake up feeling more potent and more alive. After all, the constant pressure to is something amazing, to be the next big thing will be lifted off your back. The stress and anxiety of always feeling inadequate and constantly needing to prove yourself will dissipate. And the knowledge and acceptance of your own mundane existence will actually free you to accomplish what you truly wish to accomplish, without judgment or lofty expectations.”

And it was like a weight had been lifted. Because somewhere along the line I had started taking on elements of other people’s visions of grand exceptionalism.

People like Gary Vaynerchuk, Brad Burchard, Tony Robbins. (people I don’t care about)

Visions of luxury world tours and millions and mansions. (visions I don’t care about)

Lifestyles of hustle and glittering peak performance and nonstop stratospheric achievement. (lifestyles I don’t care about)

I was exhausted by how high the bar was set… and it wasn’t even my bar!

I have a very specific vision for my business. A vision that aligns with my values. A vision of work that positively impacts the lives of others. Work that allows me to earn exactly the money to live in a nice home, eat good food, be with my family, travel, have savings and retirement.

I suppose it’s not terribly exciting, but when I sit with it – without comparison to others – I quite like it. I feel relaxed. So…

Why don’t I simply make a difference to the people I can reach easily? Why don’t I just keep doing what’s working? How about instead of doing more, I just do what I do now, but a little better and more focused? Why don’t I relax a little and enjoy the journey?

TRUST.

My vision is good enough.

My efforts are good enough.

My heart is good enough.

Trust my vision.

Trust my efforts.

Trust my heart.

Trust myself.

* My mother reads my blog and despises swearing, so I’ve prioritized her preference above using the real title the author gave the book.

NOTE: I found my extended trip overseas so impactful that I’m doing it again (this time in Ireland) and am taking a small group with me for a  Daring Moves Retreat.  Email me if you’d like the program details!

Filed Under: Blog, Mindset, Strategy, Stress and Overwhelm

Prague Blog, Part 1: The Glamour vs. the Reality

October 9, 2019 by Mary Cravets 2 Comments

Heads up! There’s a surprise ending ahead… While my month working from Prague was a big bold daring move, there was a BIG difference between the touristy high points and the day-to-day reality of working in a foreign country. Here is a brief reflection of lessons from my trip, and the unexpected aha moment in the end.

Working abroad for a month instead of working from home…

Sounds pretty glamorous, right?

Yes, it’s an absolute thrill and it looks super cool on social media. But it is challenging.

Everything takes longer than expected.

Things look kind of the same on the surface, but I discovered that everything was either a little different, or a LOT different than expected.

To accomplish anything, I had to employ entirely different skills. Ones that – even though I thought I was prepared – I didn’t even know I needed.

Some of the things that I expected would be easy, were difficult. And some of the things I expected would be difficult, were easy.

Mary in Prague: What it looked like vs What it often felt like

 

After a while, I figured out that getting comfortable with the unexpected was an emotional muscle I needed to bulk up!

Communication was crazy: often I thought I was being clear about what I wanted, but instead ended up frustrated.

On a day-to-day basis, if I’m being honest, I was often more frustrated than delighted. However, upon looking back, it was a tremendously rewarding and fun experience.

In the end, it pushed me WAY past my comfort zone, helped me discover how much I am truly capable of, and showed me just how much freedom I truly have.

Now, how does this relate to owning a business? This is the surprise ending.

Go back to the bolded sentence at the beginning and replace it with, “Owning your own business instead of working for someone else…” Then re-read my list of realizations and I think you’ll see the parallels.

;- )

Maybe it’s time for you to make a few comfort-zone-stretching, daring moves of your own!

Filed Under: Blog

[FAQ] Should I speak for free?

July 29, 2019 by Mary Cravets Leave a Comment

Frequently Asked Questions about Speaking for Free
by Mary Cravets, Client Generation Expert

  1. Doesn’t speaking for free devalue my expertise?

    https://www.facebook.com/MaryCravets/videos/351518635786529/UzpfSTMwMjYxMjg5NTc2MzoxMDE1NjA2MTUyNDg1NTc2NA/?notif_id=1564428902316239&notif_t=page_post_reaction
    Click to view the Facebook Live video FAQ

Not when you are intentional about your strategy. I’ve been speaking for free for over 7 years and am now a nationally recognized expert, highly appreciated for my willingness to show up and give my time. In no way does this feel like I am devaluing my expertise… especially because every year for the last four years I’ve generated over 6 figures in revenue from unpaid speaking.

 

I’ve seen a lot of people decide they absolutely must get paid upfront for speaking, and it often holds them back. They get intimidated by the highly competitive space, which results in getting no experience and generating no revenue. They stay safely (but frustratedly) in their comfort zone.

I don’t know if it’s self-sabotage or they heard an expert say you have to get paid in order to be legit, but I do know that there is a solid way to make an impact and income through unpaid speaking.

I’ve done it. My clients have done it. It just means being wicked strategic and totally committed to making an impact… even if it takes you WAY outside your comfort zone. I share solid tools about how to make this leap this in my upcoming webinar.

2. How do I make money speaking for free?
Let me start with a fundamental understanding: you must receive

compensation in exchange for sharing your expertise. Otherwise, you are volunteering your time. Which is absolutely fine, IF you are not looking for speaking to be a profitable strategy in your business.

In a paid speaking engagement, you are compensated with money.

For an unpaid engagement, fair compensation is the opportunity to invite the audience to work with your further. The way you make money from unpaid speaking is simply from generating new business, usually in the form of new clients.

I go more deeply into how to do this in my upcoming webinar, Generate More Clients from Unpaid Speaking Gigs.

3. When should I NOT take an unpaid gig?

Since your compensation is the opportunity to invite the audience to work with you further, don’t take gigs when:

The audience doesn’t contain your ideal client. Since your presentation is about offering value as opposed to a sales pitch to convince people of something, if an unpaid gig doesn’t contain your ideal client, you have no opportunity for compensation.

The group wants you to change your talk topic or title. Your talk must be designed to attract your ideal clients. When you change your talk topic or title, it dilutes your strategy of speaking to what is important to your ideal client, which reduces your chances of attracting clients to the audience and to your offer.

The group doesn’t allow you to make an offer. If you cannot take a minute or two to introduce your services and how people can take the next step if they are interested, you are unlikely to generate clients. Remember: you must have the opportunity to receive compensation, and not being able to make an offer shuts the door to that opportunity.

4. So… does that mean the presentation is more like a teaser where I don’t give a lot of information just so I can make a sales pitch?

Absolutely not! (takes a deep breath…) If there’s one thing that drives me crazy, it’s a talk that is designed simply to showcase a speaker’s agenda for the purposes of selling. It’s so obvious and clumsy and inauthentic. When I see speakers go this route, I just cringe and wish I could sit down with them and show them a better way.

When you speak for free, set the goal of providing value to the audience whether or not they choose to work with you further. Got that?

SIDE NOTE: my top value is Impact. I absolutely could not show up in front of an audience and not provide transformation. And I wouldn’t expect you to, either. It’s not how we’re built!

When you speak for free, you have to connect with your audience, build rapport, provide solid value, create curiosity and desire, and invite them to work with you further. It’s a lot to do in one talk, so it’s critically important that you don’t try to wing it.

Join my webinar, Generate More Clients from Unpaid Speaking Gigs and I’ll teach you what to do before, during and after an unpaid speaking gig so you can grow your business!

Filed Under: Blog

Better Results from 3 Hip-hop Inspired Questions

June 11, 2019 by Mary Cravets 4 Comments

I really, really want to be a great hip hop dancer.

I want to look cool. I want to be edgy and badass. I want to wow you and show you that this 48-year-old can really get DOWN with her bad self.

So I took a class or two and then learned a routine on YouTube. Then learned another routine on YouTube… and guess what?

I look completely dorky.

WHAT!? After all this work I don’t look like Matt Steffanina, Jabbawockeez or The Royal Family?

Don’t laugh, but I was seriously aggravated by this. I went into full-on whiny baby mode, “This is stupid. Why can’t I do this? I look like an idiot. But I’m trying! And I’m working so hard at this…”

Which is where I had to stop myself.

Really? I was working SO hard at this? Let’s review…

2018: take 3 break dancing classes, then practice one dance routine for 6 weeks.

Fast forward to mid-2019: remember – hey I want to be a hip-hop superstar… I’ll learn another routine. Spend 20 minutes on it and realize I look ridiculous.

I invested almost nothing into my burgeoning hip-hop career and expected to be a Fly Girl?

How. Embarrassing.

Now let me tell you, taking an honest look in the mirror about this wasn’t fun and it REALLY wasn’t pretty, but here’s the point of this story: to change your results, you’ve got to start by honestly evaluating the quantity and quality of your efforts.

Because what you imagine is happening, and what is actually happening can be two very different things.

In my mind, I imagined I was practicing hip-hop non-stop. After all, I watched HHI (Hip-Hop International) videos all the time. I’d even posted one of my breakdancing classes on Facebook, so… obviously I was working hard at it.

But the reality? Not so much.

To become exceptionally good at hip-hop – or anything in life – you’ve got to start by getting honest about the work that needs to be done.

Take a moment and take a look at any area of your business or your life where you’re not getting results and ask yourself:

1. How long has this been going on?
2. What is the work that needs to be done to change this?
3. Am I willing to do what it takes to get different results?

As for my hip-hop career? I got to question #3 and am undecided.

I’ll keep you posted.

Email me if you’d like better results from your client generation efforts. I’ll get you details about upcoming programs!

Filed Under: Blog, Mindset, Strategy

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