Mary Cravets

Picture this…

I was on the beach. I’d cleared my schedule so I could meditate and write and to clarify my vision of the next level of my business.

I came up with… nothing.

So I took deep breaths and let it go and…

Nothing.

Hours of nothing.

The relaxing day at the beach turned into a day of pure frustration.

I was so aggravated, I started saying crazy things to myself.

“Maybe I shouldn’t have this business at all.”

“Maybe I’m just selfish and don’t really care about people.”

“Maybe I should just buy a lottery ticket.”

I carried this crazy headspace into the next week. And the next.

Then in a seemingly unrelated event, I made a very difficult and emotional decision to let go of something that played a big role in my business.

The minute I made that decision, my vision snapped into sharp focus.

I was holding on so tightly to something that was no longer working that it eclipsed my entire vision.

With hindsight, it is so obvious.

But in the moment, with all that beach around me and the sound of the waves and space in my schedule with no pressure, and still coming up with no answers, all I could think was, “What’s wrong with me?”

In the future, I will do my best to remember that I’m smart and very motivated, and then ask a better question: “What do I need to let go of in order to welcome in something new?”

That is, the words I chose as my theme for the year. It’s weird.

Because I pick my word or words for the year and they guide my focus and attention. This year, I chose them and promptly forgot them.

People even posted on social media with reminders to revisit your themes for the year, and I just drew a complete blank.

So finally, FINALLY I remembered to go to where I jotted them down. Plenty and Wonder. Ohhhhh, right.

I may not have remembered them, and for the life of me I can’t recall what inspired them 😊… but looking at the first 3 months of the year, it’s clear that I am living them!

Plenty.

Not only are we on track to exceed our stretch goal by nearly six figures, but also my family gathered around me for my birthday. Never have I felt more loved or appreciated how precious it is to gather with those I love.

Wonder.

Making the big mindset shift from being the sole service provider in my business to CEO. Now some days this is more of a “I wonder what the hell I was thinking” than “WOW, how wonderful” – but hey, isn’t that just the universe’s sense of humor showing up 100%?

So take a moment. Revisit your word for the year.

And if you take that moment to reflect and notice you’re not where you want to be with your business, please let me and my team know what we can do to support you, ok?

Feeling whiny the other day, I posted on social media that all of my healthy habits had gone out the window.

Within a day, responses had poured in and they essentially fell into three categories:

1. That’s ok, we love you.
2. Restart with a small habit to get back on track.
3. Try my program or service to support you.

Then came the text from Heather Moreno of Weight Breakthrough, who I hire from time to time to be my health coach, asking if I was ok.

Then she called and asked why I hadn’t reached out to her.

The first thing that popped into my mind was that I wasn’t ready to hire anyone, I was just bitching on Facebook. But it occurred to me that something very interesting going on in my mind.

Why hadn’t I seriously considered retaining Heather again or buying some of the recommended products that were offered?

Then it occurred to me that until I’m dealing with serious health or weight consequences, I will not pay someone to help me.

Let me put that into a broader perspective for you:

Until your ideal client is dealing with serious consequences from the problem they have, they are unlikely to hire you.

Like:

… if they outgrow the stretchiest pants in their closet,

… or they can’t get out of bed in the morning because they hate their job so much,

… or they can’t take one more day staring at social media where it seems the whole world is getting new clients, but they can’t get traction.

People take action when they are dealing with negative consequences on the daily.

What’s the point?

Well, let me pull this all together and put a bow on it for you… don’t be reluctant to express the consequences (often called pain points) in your messaging. Calling out the consequences meets your clients exactly where they are in the moment, helping them see that you understand what they’re going through and that you can help them overcome it.

Finally, I got a standing desk. After years of trying to cobble together a solution of standing desk converters, I finally said THAT’S IT. I can’t sit it any longer! 

So, I got a standing desk. And I got lots of accessories like drawers, hooks, keyboard trays, and filing cabinets. I invested in everything I thought I needed to make my office work for me. 

I wanted to put together my new desk immediately!! NOW NOW NOW!! It’s new and promises to be fantastic!! 

So… while the goal was to up-level my desk experience, I ended up with my entire upstairs in complete disarray. Files in boxes. Spin bike crammed into the bedroom. Boxes on the bed. Boxes downstairs. Boxes on the landing. Boxes in my office… where there is now one huge desk shoved in front of the couch and one desk that needs assembly. 

In the beginning when I was ordering the desk I totally had in mind what I wanted and what the outcome would look like. But there was a crapload of work and mess and tiredness that I did not foresee. Yes I realize now that this mess had to happen in order to get to the next level but I didn’t plan for it. 

When people I coach want to up-level, THIS messy, exhausted space is where they often give up. Because all evidence points to your goal feeling further away than ever. 

My recommendation is: Keep going.

To up-level you have to: 

• Decide and commit to your goal 
• Create a new plan 
• Take action 
• Rearrange your habits and thinking 
• Take action 
• Endure the mess 
• Take action 
• Resist going back to where it’s tidy and safe. 
• Take more action 
• Take breaks and nurture yourself 

And ask for help. Enduring the mess is easier when you’ve got someone in your corner who knows that the mess is temporary and can point this out while cheering you on. 

Here’s the part I always forget: what I think up-leveling looks like and what it actually looks like are usually two very different things.  

By Sunday evening the new desk was assembled as we found a workaround for the parts we thought we needed. But I’m still crammed into my office with 2 desks, a small couch, a spin bike and an armoire, and boxes upon boxes.

Have a look as this is what up-leveling looks like in-process. 

Obviously I still have a few things to do… 

The moral of the story is if you are in the middle of an up-leveling process and it feels messy or half-completed or not quite what you expected, breathe… this is the process. Stick with your plan and ask for help so you don’t snap back to doing what you’ve always done. Remember that you’ve been down that road and you know that it doesn’t go where you want to be.