I found a new solution to stress – confession. The particular stress I experienced this week was made up of equal parts frenzy, pretending everything was ok, and confusion.
You see, I have this project I’m working on, and if it doesn’t go well, I won’t be able to fulfill obligations I made to some colleagues. A terrible feeling.
So I’ve been running around like a crazy person saying “It’s ok! No worries!” When in fact, things were not really ok, and I was really worried.
What did I do? I confessed. I laid out the situation to my colleagues, and let them know that I would understand if they wanted to bow out of their commitment.
In an instant, 95% of my stress was gone. Of course, it got me thinking… what happened, exactly?
I think my stress was caused by getting further and further out of alignment with my integrity. By simply telling the truth, I snapped back into alignment. Right away, new ideas flowed in and I felt my energy return.
What was the most important element of this confession process? When I acknowledged the problem, and confessed it to myself.
Here are some ways to know when it might be time to ‘fess up:
- When you’re telling yourself “I’m doing everything I can!” Are you really? Or are you perhaps keeping yourself overly busy to avoid doing the things that scare you?
- When you keep doing things that don’t work. Doing more of what doesn’t work, doesn’t make it work. Confess, give it up, and new ideas are given the opportunity to flow in.
- When you’re saying “I know. I know. I know.” – but you really don’t know. Try saying, “I don’t know. I need help.” Or “I need to learn.” There is SO much power in this confession!
How do you know when a confession has worked? From the instant sense of ease and humility you get. Like you don’t have to pretend anymore, and it becomes easy to move forward.
Dennis Tomko says
It is always easier for me to be busy with stuff rather than do what needs to be done if what needs to be done is unpleasant. I never answer things like I am just now, but I need to call for an appointment this afternoon, and this is much easier. (does that make it your fault?)
Guess I best get on the phone now.
Mary Cravets says
Appointment with me? Awesome!